Questions being asked of me have started to become different.  At the beginning of this project, most of the questions had yes or no answers.  Answering questions was not difficult, they were just weird.  It seems that the game has changed a bit.

Now, the things I am being asked are more about what my motivations are rather than my thoughts.  This is both frightening and intriguing.  I have learned that saying what we want or think is easy.  Giving our reasons behind what we do is both challenging and unnerving.

All of us can simply say what we want.  When we have to think about why, we want these things, a pause follows.  To dig into your heart for why you want something can take a lot of effort and mental strain.

What is unsettling about telling the truth behind our motivations is that we dig into the things that we might not want to see.  Not everything that we do is for an evil desire, probably almost everything that we do is harmless or helpful.  What makes this more difficult for me is that I always have to tell the truth, I can never lie.  Well, thats not the whole truth.  The project says that I can't lie, but I have.  I find that even when I have a truth ideal in mind, I still lie or avoid things for comfort's sake.  That seems like cheating.  That's because it is.  Social ideas seemed to be so ingrained in me that they are really hard to shake.  What I have conflict about is whether or not the absolute, unwavering, and unyielded truth will actually help a situation.

For instance, you don't tell a friend that has suffered a trauma that everything will be alright and expect that what you said will be helpful.  You simply love on that person and reach that later.  However, my problem lies with whether or not to share everything on my heart with someone.  Why would I say everything and maybe burden them beyond what was needed?  How could it benefit someone to uproot what they seem to need right now?  Sometimes, for now, it seems they whole truth sometimes needs to stay a bit hidden.